{"id":9290,"date":"2026-01-29T17:48:18","date_gmt":"2026-01-29T17:48:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/?post_type=article&p=9290"},"modified":"2026-01-29T17:48:18","modified_gmt":"2026-01-29T17:48:18","slug":"please-pass-the-flotsam","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/","title":{"rendered":"Please Pass the Flotsam"},"content":{"rendered":"

Matt Cashion<\/h2>\n

 <\/p>\n

I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0like to think before coffee, but\u00a0Dr. Death was coming for dinner, so my first thought of the morning had to do with the dread of the evening and my fear that I would behave quite badly. If I behaved badly enough, Maria promised a rapid divorce with zero custody.\u00a0So\u00a0I tried not to think about it. I walked into the kitchen and moved past her, seated at the table, eight months pregnant, phone in hand, and when I got to where my cup was supposed to be\u2014the cup I rinsed every night to use every morning so I could save dishwasher space and reduce energy consumption\u2014it wasn\u2019t there, and she said, \u201cOh my God, they\u2019ve had a shipwreck.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhere\u2019s my cup?\u201d I\u00a0said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHoly shit,\u201d she said. \u201cThey almost died.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

She had a tendency toward ambiguous\u00a0pronoun usage\u00a0when reporting news from her phone. It was irritating. I looked in the dishwasher.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019re okay,\u201d she said. \u201cBut damn\u2014<\/span>a <\/span><\/i>shipwreck<\/em>!\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Before we married, ten years ago,\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0asked that our morning protocol forbid serious talk BC (Before\u00a0Coffee). I meant to honor my side of the agreement.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI left it\u00a0on\u00a0the counter last night,\u201d I said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019re you talking about?\u201d\u00a0she\u00a0said.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019re\u00a0<\/span>you<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>talking about?\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cTeri, Luke, and Lou,\u201d Maria said, like\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0missed that part. \u201cThey\u2019ve been in a fucking shipwreck in the middle of Lake Michigan.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAre they okay?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI just said they were okay.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Had she? Our friends Luke and Teri and their seven-year-old, Lou, were on the way to see us in Wisconsin, via Michigan, from Hawaii, where\u00a0they\u2019d\u00a0moved three years ago. For jobs! Were we jealous? Of course. We threw them a going away party, and tonight we were hosting a welcome back party\u00a0of sorts, though only one of their other friends was coming:\u00a0Finn, aka Dr. Death, a depressed ex-science professor whose life\u2019s-purpose was to make sure we kept our calendars updated for our upcoming extinction. He said\u00a0we\u2019d\u00a0passed the proverbial tipping\u00a0point,\u00a0that\u00a0civilization\u2019s\u00a0only hope was radical population control via mandatory vasectomies.\u00a0At the going-away party, I\u2019d caught him in the kitchen flirting with Maria, both of them drunk, heard him say something stupid like the species should go out with a bang.\u00a0Which was when I approached and pushed his shoulder (a tad too forcefully) and invited him to go fuck himself. Maria called me<\/span>\u00a0a jealous child, the party dissipated, and I spent the night on the couch and the next three days apologizing, groveling. She said, \u201cJust because\u00a0he\u2019s\u00a0brilliant and sexy\u00a0doesn\u2019t\u00a0mean\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0do anything; stop being so insecure.\u00a0It\u2019s\u00a0gross.\u201d Brilliant?\u00a0I guess\u00a0<\/span>he\u2019d<\/em>\u00a0agree. He talked a lot about himself, how he\u2019d grown up in Germany, attended Berkeley for his PhD,\u00a0joined an ecoterrorist group in Oregon, lived off-grid in his thirties, built a house in New Mexico from old tires and bottles (an Earthship!),\u00a0then took a teaching job in Wisconsin and developed a\u00a0cult following among students and colleagues. I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0like him. But Luke liked him, and I liked Luke, so I gritted my teeth and told Luke\u00a0to\u00a0invite him. Luke and Teri were solid and fair-minded\u00a0Midwesterners,\u00a0people\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0want on my jury should I\u00a0murder\u00a0Dr. Death.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYour coffee cup\u2019s outside where you left it,\u201d Maria said.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I pulled out a new cup, filled it, added almond milk. Six months ago, Maria announced\u00a0we were going from vegetarians to vegans.\u00a0I was trying.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cTheir boat capsized,\u201d Maria said. \u201cLuke\u2019s father\u2019s boat. Teri\u2019s texting me on her mother\u2019s phone.\u00a0They\u2019re\u00a0really shaken up.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIs a capsize the same as a shipwreck?\u201d I said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou just put the almond milk in the cupboard.\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0asked you to stop buying it because\u2014as Finn told us last time\u2014it takes one gallon of water to produce a single almond and the water situation in California is fucked, except for the almond owners, as\u00a0we\u2019ve\u00a0discussed.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Had we?\u00a0The week before,\u00a0she\u2019d\u00a0found a bag of frozen spinach in the closet.\u00a0The day before, when I locked myself out of the house again, I said I should get tested for early onset\u00a0whatever-you-call-it, ha-ha. I blamed my absentmindedness on her pregnancy, which\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0go over well.\u00a0It was partly true; I stayed distracted with worry. I was\u00a0nearly forty, an unskilled and unemployed non-laborer, anxious over the world my child would inhabit if I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0kill her first by leaving her in a locked car. We squeaked by on Maria\u2019s teaching job, and I had helped briefly by teaching fourth grade, first as a substitute, then as full-time temporary, but I couldn\u2019t keep track of names, and one day when I corrected a kid\u2019s grammar, he mocked my\u00a0Southern accent, which led me to calling him a\u00a0<\/span>little shit<\/em>, which led the principal to expel me.\u00a0So\u00a0I returned to being a househusband\u00a0and\u00a0tried to make Maria happy. Daily trips to Trader Joe\u2019s for vegan food and eco-friendly cleaning products. Between shopping, cooking, and cleaning, I watched YouTube videos\u00a0on\u00a0how to install low-flush toilets (in progress) and ways to maximize energy efficiency, which led to\u00a0great\u00a0despair because I had no know-how, which led to hours on the\u00a0Internet and another hour erasing my history. Lately, I spent my afternoons staring into the sinkhole in front of our house. City crews were working on it, running big machines that backed up and beeped, backed up and beeped\u2014<\/span>all day<\/em>\u2014stretching hoses down the street\u00a0they\u2019d\u00a0plowed\u00a0up.\u00a0Our town was in the midst of a sinkhole epidemic.\u00a0I\u00a0couldn\u2019t\u00a0wait to hear Finn\u2019s opinion on <\/span>the topic.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAre you going to behave tonight?\u201d Maria said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I pointed to my full coffee cup and\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0answer.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Dr. Death was anti-air-conditioning, and since\u00a0<\/span>his<\/em>\u00a0comfort was key,\u00a0we\u2019d\u00a0be\u00a0eating outside, where\u00a0we\u2019d\u00a0enjoy another record-setting day over\u00a0one hundred\u00a0degrees.\u00a0He\u2019d\u00a0developed an actual air-conditioning allergy\u00a0(allegedly), claimed we should all be conditioning ourselves toward hotter times, that we\u00a0shouldn\u2019t\u00a0fool ourselves into feeling comfortable while the planet burned. Meanwhile, the Wisconsin natives were going nuts.\u00a0A middle-aged man beat an elderly man to death after arguing over a parking space\u00a0at a home improvement store. A walker on a bike trail clotheslined a biker. Road-raging lunatics fired pistols. Everywhere, people seethed with anger, waiting for the smallest excuse to yell profanities and raise middle fingers.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOf course I\u2019ll behave,\u201d I said. \u201cNo problem.\u201d And I hoped it\u00a0was\u00a0true.\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0agreed to take care of everything if Maria agreed to rest.\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0clean the backyard, arrange seating, fill coolers with ice, beer, water, set up fans, mosquito-fighting accessories, pick up food\u00a0we\u2019d\u00a0ordered from the\u00a0Co-op at great expense, be a pleasant host, make sure Dr. Death stayed happy.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria got the long-handled duster from the cupboard, then stepped on an unstable\u00a0chair to knock down spiderwebs.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s not safe,\u201d I said, and went outside.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When I went for the mower, I discovered my gas can had been stolen. These were the end times all right. People were desperate. When I reported this news to Maria, she came to the garage and pointed to the can sitting on top of the upright piano\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0salvaged last month.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cSomeone\u00a0<\/span>moved<\/em>\u00a0it,\u201d I said, hoping\u00a0she\u2019d\u00a0laugh, but\u00a0she\u2019d\u00a0already walked away.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I drove to the gas station to fill the can, forgot the\u00a0beer and ice,\u00a0returned, then mowed, then went out again\u00a0for tiki torches, scented candles, an extra fan and extension cord, and when I next saw Maria, I was in a chair beneath our dying\u00a0elm tree, near the bottom of my\u00a0third\u00a0gluten-free\u00a0beer,\u00a0a recipe that helped me discover I was not, in fact, allergic to alcohol and could therefore\u00a0<\/span>Drink\u00a0Wisconsibly<\/em>, as the\u00a0T-shirts say.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

She said, \u201cDid you plan to shower and pick up the food\u00a0<\/span>before<\/em>our guests arrived?\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOf course,\u201d I said, like I\u00a0hadn\u2019t\u00a0lost track of time.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria told me three times to make sure the Mediterranean bean dish entr\u00e9e was\u00a0<\/span>not<\/em> topped with cheese. It was. The youngster I dealt with fetched his manager, who came with a copy of the order and showed me the empty space beneath the \u201cspecial requests\u201d box, which meant it was my fault. I imagined Maria\u2019s face and\u00a0couldn\u2019t\u00a0bear the disappointment, then I imagined Finn accusing me of sustaining the dairy industry (in Wisconsin!) which was killing us because of the land\u00a0required\u00a0to grow cow food vs. vegetables, plus runoff from poop and pee, plus cow farts. They prepared a new dish.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When I got home, Luke, Teri, and Lou had just pulled into our driveway and Maria was\u00a0greeting\u00a0them, sporting a nice (new?)\u00a0sundress. For Finn? I\u00a0wasn\u2019t\u00a0a jealous guy, normally, but I\u00a0couldn\u2019t\u00a0<\/span>forget<\/span>\u00a0the way\u00a0he\u2019d\u00a0flirted with her.\u00a0<\/span>Stay cool<\/em>,\u00a0I told\u00a0myself. Our friends were here, and I was glad. We\u00a0welcomed\u00a0them as if\u00a0they\u2019d\u00a0returned from war.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe had a shipwreck,\u201d said Lou. He\u00a0was\u00a0seven now, a smart kid.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI know,\u201d I said. \u201cDo you need a drink?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s going on here?\u201d Teri said, pointing to our sinkhole, the\u00a0stretched out\u00a0hoses, the yellow backhoe parked in our street.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMore of a boating accident,\u201d Luke said, and laughed that hair-trigger laugh of his.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re installing a swimming pool,\u201d Maria said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll take a drink,\u201d Lou said. \u201cWater with no ice, please.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We led them out back to chairs in front of the two fans\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0arranged to create enough breeze to discourage mosquitoes and break the heat. It was nearly 7 p.m. by then,\u00a0temps\u00a0moving from unbearable to\u00a0uncomfortable. The fans surrounded scented candles,\u00a0and tiki torches surrounded the fans. They exhaled, happy to be free of cars and boats,\u00a0roads\u00a0and water.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria slapped her neck.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYour blood type is attractive,\u201d said Lou.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThank you, Lou,\u201d Maria said, and we laughed.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was easy to laugh with them.\u00a0We\u2019d\u00a0missed doing so for the past three years. Maria and Teri met when they found themselves volunteering\u00a0with the\u00a0urban gardening task force, the homeless task force, the hunger task force, a save-the-marsh task force, etc. They had us over, we had them over, found it comforting to be in their calming presence, which I hoped was mutual, though I suspected we clung to them more than they needed us, and when Lou was born, they clung to him, as you\u2019d\u00a0expect,\u00a0just\u00a0as we would soon\u00a0cling to whatever came out of Maria. Other universities recruited Luke; he got offers his department\u00a0couldn\u2019t\u00a0match. He narrowed his choices to a big\u00a0university in Alabama (more money, light teaching load, top-shelf labs) and a college in Hawaii (less money, heavy teaching load, poorer labs). They came for drinks and dinner, asked our opinions.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNeither,\u201d Maria had said. \u201cYou can\u2019t leave us stranded here.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDid I hear you say,\u201d I said, \u201cmore money to teach fewer classes?\u00a0That\u2019s\u00a0a no-brainer.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

They took less money and more work to live in Hawaii. A year later, when we saw the footage of lava explosions flooding streets and flattening homes, we kept calling and texting to\u00a0see if they were okay, but we never heard from them. Teri was out helping people,\u00a0and Luke was conducting drone-based research on the lava. When the lava-rivers cooled enough for Teri to finally write, she said, \u201cWe\u2019re\u00a0fine. Luke says\u00a0we\u2019re\u00a0lucky to be here in the middle of all this, but\u00a0it\u2019s\u00a0traumatic, explosions every thirty seconds.\u00a0I\u2019m\u00a0getting used to the dinosaur-sized roaches who sleep with us. More later.\u201d\u00a0They\u2019d\u00a0survived the lava, got nicked by a typhoon, and now\u00a0they\u2019d\u00a0survived near-drownings, and seemed, still, to be the ones worth clinging to.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I wanted to hear about Hawaii, ask about their guest bedroom, fish for an invitation to visit, but before I could say much at all, Dr. Death came strolling around back wearing his bike helmet and backpack, wine bottle in hand, a\u00a0T-shirt that featured an image of an hourglass with a circle around it. Luke and Teri raced to him for hugs. He handed me the wine while staring at Maria. He put one hand on her bare shoulder and one hand on her bloated stomach.\u00a0<\/span> \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHow did this happen?\u201d\u00a0he\u00a0said. \u201cYou decide to bring a child into this dying world?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s going to\u00a0<\/span>save<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>the world,\u201d Maria said, and everyone laughed, even little Lou.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe had a shipwreck!\u201d Lou told him.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He sat next to Maria, of course, his left knee nearly touching her right. He kept his biking helmet on, unfastened.\u00a0When\u00a0I asked politely if\u00a0he\u2019d\u00a0like beer, wine, liquor, or water, he said, \u201cYes!\u201d\u00a0Everyone laughed. A real comedian.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMore of a boating accident,\u201d Luke said, and giggled.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When I handed him a beer, he\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0thank me. He lofted it into the air.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cA toast!\u201d\u00a0he\u00a0shouted.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Of course. I wished\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0beaten\u00a0him to it.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cTo death,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBeautiful,\u201d I said, and Maria shushed me.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOur proximity to\u00a0extinction,\u201d he continued, \u201cis a gift from deep time that\u00a0provides us\u00a0a glimpse of the sublime, which invites us also to embrace the unknowable scheme of the universe.\u201d He\u00a0paused,\u00a0on the verge of tears. \u201cWhich is to say, we\u00a0feel profound awe that you are\u00a0<\/span>here<\/em>, to make us also feel\u00a0so very much\u00a0alive.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Maria said, nearly singing. She clinked her wine glass against Finn\u2019s beer,\u00a0and they looked into each other\u2019s eyes. I clinked my beer against Lou\u2019s water.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u00a0<\/span>was<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>frightening,\u201d Luke said. He described how his father\u00a0had taken\u00a0them for a ride in his boat equipped with two motors, a small one for fishing and a big one to get through Lake Michigan\u2019s shipping channels.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI had my doubts right away,\u201d he said. \u201cI saw how the weight was distributed\u2014the big motor weighed down the back of the boat, plus a big gas tank sitting in the rear,\u00a0<\/span>and<\/span> he\u2019s a big guy. Maybe 250 pounds. I told him I didn\u2019t like it, but\u2014\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDads are dumb,\u201d\u00a0Maria\u00a0said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI was dumb too,\u201d Luke said. \u201cI\u00a0should\u2019ve\u00a0been firmer. All that weight\u2019s in the back of the boat, and\u00a0we\u2019re\u00a0speeding out through the channel and hit a big wave at a bad angle,\u00a0and the front end flew up and sent us flying.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe boat was\u00a0<\/span>standing<\/em>!\u201d Lou said, holding his palm up to\u00a0demonstrate.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAnd we\u2019re all in the water,\u201d Teri said, \u201cand Luke\u2019s dad is yelling,\u00a0<\/span>stay calm<\/em>\u2014<\/span>stay close to the boat<\/em>, and I\u2019m like no way dude, because the boat looks like it\u2019s about to fall on top of us,\u00a0so we swam away and watched the boat go down. It took thirty minutes. Then\u00a0we\u2019re\u00a0just\u00a0hanging out, floating there by ourselves in the middle of Lake Michigan, clinging to flotsam.\u00a0I\u2019ve\u00a0always wanted to use that word,\u00a0<\/span>flotsam<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou were wearing PFDs, of course,\u201d Maria said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAll but my dumb dad,\u201d Luke said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe shared my piece of flotsam,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWas the water cold?\u201d Maria asked.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s flotsam?\u201d Lou asked. He sat on the edge of his chair, eager to\u00a0participate, fully on track to becoming\u00a0a mad scientist or a tortured mathematician.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMore like forty-five minutes,\u201d Luke said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s the difference between flotsam and jetsam?\u201d I asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u00a0<\/span>was<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>freezing<\/em>,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cRemember the end of\u00a0<\/span>Titanic<\/em>?\u201d I\u00a0said. \u201cWas Leo clinging to flotsam or jetsam?\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u00a0<\/span>is<\/em>\u00a0the difference?\u201d Maria said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

No one reached for their phones. It was impressive.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFlotsam,\u201d Finn said, \u201ctypically\u00a0represents\u00a0debris from wreckage that\u00a0remains\u00a0afloat. Jetsam is\u00a0what\u00a0might be discarded to prevent or delay sinking.\u00a0Flotsam\u00a0<\/span>and<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>jetsam\u00a0are\u00a0produced and owned by humans. These chairs. Candles. Fans. Extension cords. Tiki torches. Tables. Lawnmowers. Gasoline. That garage, the cars inside it, that\u00a0house\u00a0and everything it holds. Shingles. Everything you own, which now owns you as one ensnared in\u00a0a\u00a0capitalist trap.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I reached for my phone. I said, \u201cThere\u2019s a rock band called Flotsam and Jetsam.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cA giant freight ship almost saved us,\u201d Lou said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt started to turn around,\u201d Teri said. \u201cWhich was\u00a0amazing.\u00a0Something that\u00a0big, it\u00a0was going to take a while. A radical act of kindness.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat were they hauling?\u201d I asked.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJetsam,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBut then this fisherman came along,\u201d Luke said. \u201cHe helped us climb into his boat and\u00a0called the Coast Guard or rescue people or whoever.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe water tasted like oil?\u201d Finn said. \u201cShipping companies spend billions on devices to reroute pollution from the air to the water to hide it better. Open-loop scrubbers they are called.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Finn\u2019s voice made me want to drink. I got a new beer from the cooler, crumpled my empty\u00a0can,\u00a0and considered hurling it at his head.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe rescue people kept getting mad at the fisherman,\u201d Luke said.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThere are\u00a0twenty-two\u00a0<\/span>known<\/em> carcinogens floating in most water supplies,\u201d Finn\u00a0said. \u201cArsenic. Radionuclides such as uranium and radium.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFor not saying \u2018over,\u2019 or \u2018copy,\u2019 or \u2018roger,\u2019 and the fisherman was like, \u2018Look, I\u2019ve got these people in my boat, what should I do with them?\u2019 And they wouldn\u2019t answer, and the fisherman would be, like, \u2018Hello? Are you there?\u2019 And they\u2019d get mad again because he hadn\u2019t said \u2018over.\u2019 I felt bad for the guy.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe only ships should be Earthships,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAnyway,\u201d I said, trying to reroute the Earthship lecture Finn was queuing up. \u201cFlotsam is what you were clinging to while waiting to be rescued.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s an Earthship?\u201d said Lou, the little shit.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t you build your own Earthship, Finn?\u201d said Maria.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

And he was off, lecturing at great length about the house he\u2019d built from bottles and tires and assorted garbage, how each drop of precious New Mexico rainwater got used three times, how he grew his garden in his living room, how he lived in a suburb of Earthships where neighbors pooled their resources and survived with zero electricity, needing nothing.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cBut listen,\u201d I said to Luke. \u201cWhile you were clinging to flotsam in the freezing water, did you tell your dad\u00a0<\/span>I told you so<\/em>?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Luke laughed, as if\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0meant to be funny. \u201cNo,\u201d he said. \u201cThat\u00a0would\u2019ve\u00a0been counterproductive. I tried to keep things positive.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s always trying to keep things positive,\u201d Teri said, like this habit was testing their marriage. \u201cEven after the boat went down, he was like, \u2018Would someone\u00a0please\u00a0pass some flotsam?\u00a0Who\u2019s\u00a0got some flotsam?\u2019\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOur best\u00a0teacher arrives\u00a0in the form of death,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria swatted a mosquito. Finn pulled a small bottle from his pocket and passed it to her. \u201cVanilla extract,\u201d he said. \u201cIt will work for ten minutes. Soon, winter will be here, thank God.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI miss Wisconsin winters,\u201d Teri said. \u201cHow it kills the creepy crawlies.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cExcept ticks,\u201d Finn said. \u201cTicks burrow underground and return with greater immunity.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOur neighbor has had Lyme disease three times,\u201d Maria said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMy brother got a tick bite that\u00a0gave\u00a0him\u00a0a meat\u00a0allergy,\u201d Teri said. \u201cEvery time he ate meat,\u00a0he vomited.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cExcellent,\u201d Finn said. \u201cWe must breed that species of tick and drop them into meat-eaters\u2019 yards. Then take them into heavy beef-eating countries like Argentina.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAn\u00a0opossum eats 10,000 ticks per week,\u201d Lou said. \u201cLike M&M\u2019s.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo opossums eat termites?\u201d I\u00a0said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we were in Albania,\u201d Teri said, \u201cthe termites were so bad in this place we\u00a0stayed that we could hear them in the next room eating the wood. It kept us from sleeping. Then one night we heard a crash, and we went to look and saw the dining room table had collapsed.\u00a0They\u2019d\u00a0eaten the legs right out from under it.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Finn laughed and clapped. \u201cIn an Earthship, there are no termites,\u201d he said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Luke said, \u201cAfter we boarded a plane from Albania to New Zealand, a flight attendant\u00a0came down the aisle with a spray bottle she held over everyone\u2019s heads and sprayed us, without warning, without telling us what it was or why, which freaked us out. We covered our faces. We thought we were being gassed.\u00a0Then\u00a0<\/span>afterward<\/em>, like a genius, she got on the microphone and explained that she had just sprayed the plane to kill whatever we might be carrying on our clothes or shoes that could be invasive.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria swatted a mosquito. She said, \u201cPlease pass the vanilla extract.\u201d She touched Finn\u2019s forearm, I noticed, then offered her palm, into which he placed his vanilla extract.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhere are the bats when you need them?\u201d Teri asked.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe northern long-ear is endangered,\u201d Finn said. \u201cAlso, wind energy kills too many bats and birds. Also, bats only reproduce about one pup per year.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cReproduce only,\u201d I muttered, correcting his misplaced modifier.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOver 2,000 animal species vanish each day,\u201d Finn said. \u201cState birds are evacuating their states. The\u00a0loons\u00a0of Minnesota. Purple finches\u00a0of\u00a0New Hampshire. Brown\u00a0thrashers of Georgia.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s so hot in Qatar, they\u2019re air-conditioning the outdoors,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDo bats eat ticks?\u201d I\u00a0said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe ruffed grouse of Pennsylvania,\u201d Finn continued. \u201cThe goldfinch of New Jersey.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWe had a bat in our bedroom last week,\u201d Maria said.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThere are three billion fewer birds than fifty years ago,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe killed it,\u201d Maria said, pointing\u00a0at me.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI tried\u00a0to shoo it out with a box lid,\u201d I said.\u00a0\u201cI\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0<\/span>want<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>to kill it. Last week, I freed a bat from a mousetrap.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria gave me a\u00a0horrified\u00a0look. Everyone else\u00a0looked too, awaiting an explanation.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI found it like that,\u201d I said, then explained how its wing had gotten caught in the trap I\u2019d\u00a0placed on a basement ledge, how it had fallen to the ground, trap and all, so I scooped it up with a dustpan and carried it outside, opened the spring with a screwdriver, then watched\u00a0the bat\u00a0scuttle away.\u00a0Maybe a\u00a0stronger man could have killed it so it\u00a0wouldn\u2019t\u00a0die a more painful death from starvation, but I\u00a0couldn\u2019t\u00a0do it. I gave it a sporting chance.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI released it,\u201d I said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Everyone looked at me\u00a0like suddenly\u00a0<\/span>I<\/em>\u00a0was a bigger party pooper than Finn.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cYou can get traps that won\u2019t hurt mice,\u201d Luke said.\u00a0\u201cThen take them out at dusk\u00a0and toss them in\u00a0a thick patch of grass for owls to feed on.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Another pause. Finn looked into the darkening sky, suddenly somber, as if he were about to pray, or say something profound. Maria looked at the same spot as if she were seeing what he was seeing. I finished another beer.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u00a0would like to see one more\u00a0eclipse,\u201d Finn said. Then he\u00a0talked\u00a0of how wonderful it had been the previous August when\u00a0he\u2019d\u00a0met Teri,\u00a0Luke,\u00a0and Lou in Nebraska so they could experience two minutes and forty-two seconds of totality. So beautiful,\u00a0he\u00a0said. Which made me jealous. Why hadn\u2019t we been invited?\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt was like a sunset turned inside out,\u201d Finn\u00a0said.\u00a0<\/span> \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cMajor chills,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cLike\u00a0we ingested dawn,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThis old guy in a long beard and black robe kept running around yelling,\u00a0\u2018The\u00a0Messiah\u2019s here, the Messiah\u2019s here,\u2019\u201d\u00a0Luke said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cDid you film it?\u201d Maria said. <\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d Teri said. \u201cBut everyone else did. Later, we saw a clip with our faces on it. The filmmaker panned around to capture the faces looking at the eclipse, and there we were. We saw\u00a0our faces like\u00a0we\u2019d\u00a0never\u00a0seen them\u00a0before. It was weird.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI doubt I\u2019ll be alive to see the next one,\u201d\u00a0Finn said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJesus H.\u00a0<\/span>Christ<\/em>,\u201d I blurted.\u00a0I had heard enough. \u201cWhat a fucking buzzkill,\u201d I said. \u201cYou make me\u00a0feel like pouring\u00a0gasoline on myself and lighting a match. Remind me in a few months to invite you over so you can tell our child that he\u00a0shouldn\u2019t\u00a0bother leaving the crib.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201c<\/span>She<\/em>,\u201d Maria said, and giggled, trying to cut the tension.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Teri said, \u201cFinn, would you be comfortable sharing your news?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI have pancreatic cancer,\u201d he said. \u201cStage 4.5 or something.\u201d He looked at me and laughed a lips-closed kind of laugh. \u201cI might miss the next eclipse,\u201d he said. \u201cBut\u00a0also\u00a0the apocalypse. Win some, lose some. But,\u00a0please, no pity. Death and I are friends.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

His face was pale, I noticed then. Dark rings around his eyes.\u00a0Thinner than I remembered.\u00a0Pointy cheek bones. A\u00a0skeleton with acne scars. Maria studied\u00a0his face more closely too, in a way that suggested (or so it\u00a0seemed) that he was more attractive now. Which I almost understood. Of course, I\u00a0felt like\u00a0shit. Maria looked at me like I should feel worse.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I stood. I said, \u201cI\u2019m\u00a0sorry, Finn. That was\u2014I\u2019m\u00a0sorry.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNo pity,\u201d he said. \u201cLet us\u00a0act toward each other as if all of us are dying\u00a0soon.\u00a0Let us surrender to the wonder that is the incomprehensible mystery of deep time.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

No one said anything.\u00a0We wanted to honor the pause.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cA toast,\u201d I said. I tried to think of words. \u201cTo friends,\u201d I said. \u201cEspecially Lou, who has time to save us. No pressure.\u201d I went to clink my beer against Lou\u2019s water, but he was gone.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cWhere\u00a0<\/span>is<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>Lou?\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We scanned the yard. It was\u00a0nearly dark\u00a0now, dark enough for the alley light to\u00a0have come\u00a0on. Teri went inside and came back out, said, \u201cNope.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll check the sinkhole,\u201d Luke said calmly.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When he said this, I broke into a run. It was my sinkhole. I felt responsible. I\u00a0got there quickly, but it was empty.\u00a0The others arrived, and we stood on its periphery, hands on hips.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe city is sinking,\u201d Finn said. \u201cLike Venice.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We looked up and down the street. Luke called for\u00a0him,\u00a0loudly.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m going back,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Everyone followed. It was a small backyard, fenced, twenty-five yards of space between\u00a0house\u00a0and\u00a0garage. The garage door was cracked, so I\u00a0moved\u00a0that way. As soon as I did, I\u00a0heard\u00a0piano music. Something familiar and energetic.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cLou found my piano,\u201d I said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Everyone looked\u00a0toward\u00a0the music.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s taking lessons,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I explained how\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0found it\u00a0two months ago\u00a0at the end of a driveway, an old upright. I\u2019d hit a few chords, and an old man ventured out, said he\u2019d tried to sell it in his yard sale the day before, marked it down from $100 to $50 to $25 to $10, then put it on the curb with a \u201cfree\u201d sign attached. It had belonged to his dead wife, and he\u00a0was\u00a0preparing\u00a0to move into assisted living. I offered him twenty\u00a0bucks, but he waved it off. I called Two Men and a Truck\u2014one man with a philosophy degree, the other with a\u00a0history\u00a0degree\u2014and they delivered\u00a0the piano\u00a0to my house, carried it up the street around the sinkhole and into the garage.\u00a0I hated the idea\u00a0of it\u00a0going to a landfill. I plunked away all night that first night beneath a single bulb, then stored gas cans on it.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cJetsam,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It was a song anyone should recognize\u2014the Vince Guaraldi \u201cLinus and Lucy\u201d tune from the\u00a0<\/span>Charlie Brown Christmas<\/em>\u00a0show, the frenetic left hand doing its bass roll for a couple\u00a0measures before the right hand kicks in with that manic melody that makes\u00a0every\u00a0stiff\u00a0corpse\u00a0feel like dancing.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s out of tune,\u201d Finn said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cThe piano has been drinking,\u201d I gargled, channeling Tom Waits.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe played this at his recital last month,\u201d Teri said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cCharles Schultz was manic-depressive,\u201d Finn said.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe got a standing ovation,\u201d Luke said.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Maria threw her head from side to side and jogged in place, flapping her arms like Lucy, drunk on the music. I danced in\u00a0a\u00a0circle,\u00a0high-stepping, and soon enough everyone was doing\u00a0a\u00a0silly dance. What would a passing group of aliens think,\u00a0observing\u00a0this gang of humans moving\u00a0like this on a hot August night as if we were shaking off insects? Maria\u00a0danced in front of Finn, encouraging him to\u00a0move, which he began to do, clumsily,\u00a0without self-consciousness. It may have been his first time dancing. When Lou finished, Finn stepped to the garage.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOnce more, maestro!\u201d\u00a0he\u00a0yelled. \u201cMolto allegro!\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Lou obeyed, and we danced again, circling\u00a0Finn. I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0care how silly I looked. I\u00a0wasn\u2019t\u00a0drunk, but it felt like it.\u00a0Some electric\u00a0charge\u00a0hovered and bounced between bodies, and I got lost in the music Lou was making. Maria lifted her arms over her head, and Finn put his hands on her stomach as if to support the bouncing baby. I told myself that I would tell her the following morning\u00a0how\u00a0beautiful she looked, how her eyes shined, how the smile Finn returned to her was\u00a0also oddly beautiful.\u00a0The air around us turned cool.\u00a0It was darker now,\u00a0the stars\u00a0more\u00a0visible, even with the alley light. I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0want the night to end.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When Lou finished, he came out,\u00a0and we all made a fuss over him.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s out of tune,\u201d he said, and we all laughed loudly.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In a few minutes, before anyone had time to sit again, Luke said they should call it a night. They needed to get up super-early and drive their rental car to Chicago and catch their plane\u00a0to Hawaii.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Teri said, \u201cFinn, where are you staying?\u201d She explained that he had sold his home and given\u00a0away everything he owned, keeping only whatever essentials fit in his backpack.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cStay here,\u201d I said. \u201cIf\u00a0you\u2019d\u00a0like to, I mean. We have a foldout couch.\u201d\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cHe can\u2019t do air-conditioning,\u201d Maria reminded me, a little too\u00a0harshly. \u201cYou can have our backyard though, if you\u2019d like,\u201d she said.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cI prefer the riverside,\u201d he said. \u201cThere\u00a0is a community there who\u00a0brag\u00a0about their waterfront property. But tonight? Yes, I am tired and I will sleep in your yard.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cOkay,\u201d I said. \u201cSure.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cCan we get you anything?\u201d Maria said.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cNo, please. I have everything.\u201d He pointed to his backpack and the sleeping\u00a0<\/span>bag tied to it. Luke, Teri, and Lou took a moment telling Finn goodnight. Luke invited him to Hawaii, and I was not jealous. Maria kissed him on the cheek, and I didn\u2019t mind.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We showed Luke, Teri,\u00a0and Lou to their rooms and went to bed. Maria went to sleep quickly, and except for a brief dream\u00a0in which\u00a0our bed turned into a raft that floated down flooded streets, I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0sleep. I rehashed all the conversations of the evening, wanting to remember every detail. I thought about the life of our child to come,\u00a0she who\u00a0would enter the world in another month. I tried to imagine myself evolving into an adult like Luke, Teri, and even Finn, courageous people who were more alive than I.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

By 5:30 a.m., the birds were up\u2014the same loud birds that just the day before\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0found annoying\u2014so I gave up on sleep and went downstairs. I looked out front for Luke\u2019s rental car\u00a0and saw that it was gone. I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0believe I\u00a0hadn\u2019t\u00a0heard them leave based on how lightly I thought\u00a0I\u2019d\u00a0been sleeping. It occurred to me that I might never see them again. I\u00a0looked out\u00a0back for Finn, thinking I would take him a cup of coffee, but he\u00a0too was\u00a0gone.\u00a0He\u2019d\u00a0left no trace of\u00a0having been\u00a0there at all. I opened a window, felt the soft summer morning, and sat awhile, still without coffee, staring into the backyard full of tiki\u00a0torches and coolers\u00a0and fans. I stared at the space where we\u00a0had danced\u00a0to Lou\u2019s piano. The empty yard was unsettling. I felt an urge to return to our bedroom, to look in on Maria to make\u00a0certain\u00a0<\/span>she<\/span>\u00a0was there. Such silly thoughts I had while I stood so still in the middle of the kitchen. I stayed there awhile longer, staring out the window. I wanted to remember that silence and take it with me everywhere.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Matt Cashion   I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0like to think before coffee, but\u00a0Dr. Death was coming for dinner, so my first thought of the morning had to do with the dread of the evening and my fear that I would behave quite badly. If I behaved badly enough, Maria promised a rapid divorce with zero custody.\u00a0So\u00a0I tried not to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":9294,"template":"","categories":[9,48,49],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9290","article","type-article","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aquifer","category-fiction","category-literary-features"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nPlease Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Please Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Matt Cashion   I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0like to think before coffee, but\u00a0Dr. Death was coming for dinner, so my first thought of the morning had to do with the dread of the evening and my fear that I would behave quite badly. If I behaved badly enough, Maria promised a rapid divorce with zero custody.\u00a0So\u00a0I tried not to […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Florida Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2026\/01\/Cashion-headshot.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1277\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"24 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/\",\"name\":\"Please Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2026\\\/01\\\/Cashion-headshot.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-01-29T17:48:18+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2026\\\/01\\\/Cashion-headshot.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2026\\\/01\\\/Cashion-headshot.jpg\",\"width\":1277,\"height\":1280},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/please-pass-the-flotsam\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Please Pass the Flotsam\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/\",\"name\":\"The Florida Review\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Please Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Please Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review","og_description":"Matt Cashion   I\u00a0didn\u2019t\u00a0like to think before coffee, but\u00a0Dr. Death was coming for dinner, so my first thought of the morning had to do with the dread of the evening and my fear that I would behave quite badly. If I behaved badly enough, Maria promised a rapid divorce with zero custody.\u00a0So\u00a0I tried not to […]","og_url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/","og_site_name":"The Florida Review","og_image":[{"width":1277,"height":1280,"url":"http:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2026\/01\/Cashion-headshot.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Est. reading time":"24 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/","name":"Please Pass the Flotsam - The Florida Review","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2026\/01\/Cashion-headshot.jpg","datePublished":"2026-01-29T17:48:18+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2026\/01\/Cashion-headshot.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2026\/01\/Cashion-headshot.jpg","width":1277,"height":1280},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/please-pass-the-flotsam\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Please Pass the Flotsam"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/#website","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/","name":"The Florida Review","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/9290","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/article"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/9290\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9297,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/9290\/revisions\/9297"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9294"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9290"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9290"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9290"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}