{"id":2297,"date":"2017-10-09T20:17:23","date_gmt":"2017-10-09T20:17:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/floridareview.cah.ucf.edu\/?post_type=article&p=2297"},"modified":"2017-10-09T20:17:23","modified_gmt":"2017-10-09T20:17:23","slug":"from-knowing-to-unknowing","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/","title":{"rendered":"From Knowing to Unknowing"},"content":{"rendered":"

An Earlier Life, <\/em>by Brenda Miller<\/strong>
\n Ovenbird Press, 2016<\/strong>
\n 174 pages, paper, $14.95<\/strong><\/p>\n

Winner, 2017 Washington State Book Award in Memoir<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In her most recent collection of essays, An Earlier Life<\/em>, Brenda Miller examines the rich assortment of previous lives she has come through on her way to the life she currently inhabits. \u201cIn an earlier life,\u201d she begins, \u201cI was a baker in a bakery on a cobblestoned street. I woke early, in the dark, to do my work . . . In the quiet, I brought something to life.\u201d The image of Miller kneading dough in the quiet hours of morning bringing something new into being is reminiscent of her work as a writer, and she delivers a breathing work of art between the pages of this book.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In \u201cWho You Will Become,\u201d Miller reflects on a sign which always hung in the front hallway of her childhood home, the Hebrew letters for Shalom <\/em>with its multiple meanings\u2014hello, goodbye, welcome, good<\/em> and peace<\/em>. She explains, \u201cIn Hebrew, the word for God means, \u201cI am what I am becoming.\u201d This presence is always imminent, always evolving. When we say Shalom<\/em>, we are in the midst of this transition: hello, goodbye, turning to face the past and future at once.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

With that, she begins a candid examination of her life beginning in childhood and adolescence, through her early adult years and into a time of reconciliation and healing. The theme that one thing\u2014a word, an object, an event\u2014can carry more than one meaning, echoes throughout the book.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Miller\u2019s close observations illuminate the remarkable contained within the commonplace, making the scenes dance on the page, and readers can\u2019t help but pay closer attention to their own surroundings. \u201cIn Alaska, you understand how light is now a substance of its own making\u2014tactile, with particles and waves and something else. You understand how light finds the least pinhole and expands.\u201d With these opening lines of \u201cUnderstand,<\/em>\u201d readers are suddenly more aware of the light that plays around them. Miller\u2019s vivid account of her physical world brings the geography of the readers\u2019 own into sharper contrast.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Later, in the essay \u201cHow to Get Ready for Bed,\u201d <\/em>she renders the mundane task of shopping for a new mattress into a work of art, a study of all the mattress represents: sleep partners past and future from boyfriends to pets, sanctuary and isolation, and the best description of insomnia I\u2019ve read. \u201cIt\u2019s as if you\u2019re afraid of something, but you don\u2019t know what. Maybe you\u2019re afraid of that moment you slip from knowing to unknowing\u2014the moment you\u2019re with your unpartnered self alone.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yet not afraid to be vulnerable, Miller allows us to enter the places she stalled, consider decisions that led to trouble or heartache, and experience the consequences of missteps. Even so, she doesn\u2019t neglect to shine a light on the beauty contained in even the darkest places. In \u201cBeloved,\u201d an essay tense with the possibility of violence, Miller describes a day boating on a desert lake with her boyfriend. He\u2019s drinking and flaunting the fact that he could do her harm, that she\u2019s defenseless. The stakes rise when he steers the boat into a secluded cove, \u201cA place,\u201d she writes, \u201cthat in any other time, with any other person would be a romantic picnic spot.\u201d Juxtaposed against the visceral sense of mounting danger is this description of her surroundings: \u201cThis cool air in the desert, over the water. It\u2019s a land of contradiction, the light bright and subdued at once. You can motor along the wide expanse of the lake, find a small canyon to enter and look for the hanging gardens: plants growing high above the waterline, gaining foothold and flourishing on bare rock, while beneath you\u2014far beneath\u2014a ghost garden mirrors the one above.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

By age eighteen Miller writes in \u201cL\u2019Chaim,\u201d she no longer attends synagogue, but there is a thread running through these essays that suggests a search for spiritual meaning\u2014a desire to understand how each of her \u2018earlier lives\u2019 contributed to the full spectrum of her life as a whole. Miller carefully considers each remembrance as if she\u2019s turning them over and over in her hands to consider every plane, seeking the places where light shines through.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As co-author of the craft book Tell It Slant: Writing and Shaping Creative Nonfiction, <\/em>it\u2019s no surprise that Brenda Miller\u2019s writing is exceptional. Many of her essays are written in second person. Speaking directly to readers in this manner, she calls them to walk alongside her, to share in each choice that moves her to the next experience. A life unfolds full of music and grit and danger. The beauty, and the pain, and the wonder on her journey toward wholeness becomes their own, a life shared.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

In the epilogue, \u201cWe Regret to Inform You,\u201d readers are treated with an outstanding example of a hermit crab essay\u2014a term coined by Miller and co-author Susan Paola in Tell It Slant.<\/em> In the form of rejection letters, she highlights a string of her \u2018failures\u2019 at various roles and relationships\u2014with her elementary art teacher to the babies she lost in miscarriages to her grad school boyfriend, and finally, an acceptance letter from a pet adoption organization. The letters are bittersweet, sometimes funny, and always insightful.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Miller\u2019s ability to turn angst into art, to interpret the ordinary with extraordinary clarity is unmatched. Her work wakes up the senses\u2014external and internal\u2014and will resonate with readers of poetry, as well as prose. An Earlier Life<\/em> sings to readers, and they can\u2019t help but hum its tune while going about their own tasks. Like bite-sized treats, readers can consume these essays one taste at a time, or in a decadent cover-to-cover feast\u2014the perfect balance of savory and sweet.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Brenda Miller examines the rich assortment of previous lives she has come through…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":2303,"template":"","categories":[9,139],"tags":[355,356,6,357,358,359,360,314],"class_list":["post-2297","article","type-article","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-aquifer","category-book-review","tag-2017-washington-state-book-award-in-memoir","tag-an-earlier-life","tag-aquifer-the-florida-review-online","tag-brenda-miller","tag-collections","tag-heidi-sell","tag-memoir","tag-nonfiction"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nFrom Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"From Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Brenda Miller examines the rich assortment of previous lives she has come through...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Florida Review\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2017\/10\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"594\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"340\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/\",\"name\":\"From Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2017\\\/10\\\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-10-09T20:17:23+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2017\\\/10\\\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/43\\\/2017\\\/10\\\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg\",\"width\":594,\"height\":340},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/article\\\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"From Knowing to Unknowing\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/\",\"name\":\"The Florida Review\",\"description\":\"\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cah.ucf.edu\\\/floridareview\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"From Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"From Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review","og_description":"Brenda Miller examines the rich assortment of previous lives she has come through...","og_url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/","og_site_name":"The Florida Review","og_image":[{"width":594,"height":340,"url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2017\/10\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Est. reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/","name":"From Knowing to Unknowing - The Florida Review","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2017\/10\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg","datePublished":"2017-10-09T20:17:23+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2017\/10\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/43\/2017\/10\/Miller-Brenda.-An-Earlier-Life-cropped-Cover2.jpg","width":594,"height":340},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/article\/from-knowing-to-unknowing\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"From Knowing to Unknowing"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/#website","url":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/","name":"The Florida Review","description":"","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/2297","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/article"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/2297\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2303"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2297"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2297"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cah.ucf.edu\/floridareview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2297"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}